The Relationship Talk
by Durgas Dragon
Summary: Gaara and Naruto discuss their relationships


**The Relationship Talk**

_**Disclaimer: This is a purely fan-made piece that is using the world and characters from Masashi Kishimoto's **_**Naruto**_** and is made entirely for enjoyment. No financial gain has been made in the making of this piece**_

_**Summary: Gaara and Naruto discuss their relationships**_

_**Author's Note: Written for Quirkerstein. Possible out-of characterness**_

_**Constructive Criticism is always welcomed**_

_**Published: **__**20 December 2008**_

_**Rating: K+**_

**Gaara watched as Lee and Naruto got in****to another physical altercation and felt the annoyance set in again.**

**Naruto did it because '**_**somebody**_** had to beat Fuzzy-Brow' (and still lost every time). Lee did it because it was (quote) 'a Youthful Way to Bond with Fellow Ninjas and Worthy Opponents!' (unquote and end sparkle).**

**A growl nearly made it out of Gaara's throat when one of Naruto's clones got too close to punching Lee. It wasn't fair that Naruto got to gang up on his Lee like that. Lee couldn't make clones or doppelgangers or anything like that to even out the fight and Gaara didn't like that.**

**Finally, he couldn't take it any more. The sand surged up and threw all of the Narutos away from Lee.**** Lee, on the other hand, was cocooned in the fine particles of rock and transported over to Gaara's side.**

**Naruto sputtered and spat out sand. "What the hell!"**

**"We have a mission to complete."**

**"A little Training to Start our Day is Healthy and Youthful!" Lee's voice came out from the protective layer of sand Gaara had him wrapped in.**

**"He was ganging up on you and we need to complete this mission."**

**With that, Gaara started out across the desert, the sand happily carting Lee and tripping Naruto. He only let Lee out a few hours later because the ninja was close to hyperventilating over the loss of walking that could be used as training and Naruto was muttering something that sounded like 'and they say **_**my**_** relationship with the Bastard is screwed up'.**

**Gaara pointedly didn't look behind him as Naruto howled as the sand dune he was on suddenly dumped him down the backside of it.**

**The Kazekage had nothing to do with doing that, either.**

**Naruto really should learn some basic grace, being a ninja and all.**

**Gaara managed to distract Lee from helping Naruto up or touching the other boy by offering to use the sand to create some makeshift weights to make up for the time Lee didn't get to walk.**** Naruto was promptly forgotten as Lee gushed happy tears about how Wonderful Gaara was.**

**Naruto glared at Gaara as Lee pranced off with the new sand weights. "You are unhealthily possessive of Fuzzy Brows."**

**Gaara made sure to ****give the fading bruises on Naruto's neck a long and level stare.**

**Naruto—at least—had the good graces to blush before blundering forwards. "You can't just wrap Lee in a blanket of sand and think that he'll be happy there!"**

**Since Gaara could see Lee mixing skips with his occasional fighting moves, he decided Naruto didn't know anything about relationships.**** Anyhow, Naruto couldn't say anything; **_**his**_** relationship was **_**far**_** unhealthier than anything that Lee and Gaara had.**

**"Hey! Hey! HEY!" Apparently, Naruto wasn't used to being ignored. "Don't walk away! We're having a discussion here!"**

**"I'm told discussions require two or more people. I'm not participating, so it cannot be a discussion."**

**"…Yeah, well—well—well, you **_**should**_** be!"**

**Gaara made a mental note to mention to Tsunade-san that she get someone to try and teach Naruto eloquence.**** In the meantime, he had to make sure that Lee didn't get too overly exuberant. They did still have to complete this mission and it wouldn't do them any good if Gaara had to put Lee into a body cast of sand to make sure that the Leaf ninja didn't hurt himself further.**

**Better go and check on Lee, just to be safe.**

**Naruto tried to launch a flying tackle at Gaara. "Get back here—"**

**The wave of sand only left Naruto's head visible. Gaara felt the odd emotion—Temari had told him it was called 'exasperation' and he'd probably feel it a lot with the loud blond—and decided it might just go faster if he pretended to care about what Naruto wanted to say. "What are you saying."**

**"I'm **_**sayin'**_**," Naruto's head squawked indignantly, "that relationships **_**don't**_** mean you wrap your significant other in wool!"**

**"I don't wrap Lee in wool." Wool wasn't practical. It retained too much heat. Lee would get heat stroke or worse if Gaara covered him with wool.**

**Naruto gave him a withering gaze. "It's an **_**expression**_**! It's not to be taken literally! My **_**point**_** is that you have to let him be free to do his own thing! You can just follow him around and think that you can protect him from everything!"**

**"Like you're free to do whatever you want?**** Like you saying that you can take care of yourself?"**

**Naruto's face flamed. "Stick to the subject and leave the Bastard out of it!"**

**"It's the basis of your argument," Gaara pointed out, resisting the urge to go make sure Lee hadn't done anything too stupid while he wasn't watching. "Your knowledge of relationships comes from your own experiences.**** Your advice stems from what you know, and since the only relationship—"**

**"I'm NOT basing this solely off of my relationship with the Bastard!"**

**"You've had other ones to compare it to?"**

**"I have had **_**plenty**_** of relationships! I mean, look at Iruka-sensei and Kakashi-sensei and Sakura-chan—"**

**"You've had romantic relationships with all those people?"**

**"NO! Ew, **_**Kakashi-sensei**_**?! EW! He's—he's **_**old**_**! And Iruka-sensei's like a **_**brother**_**! Ew!"**

**"So my original assessment was correct."**

**"What?"**

**"That the only basis for your romantic experiences is with—"**

**"I travelled with JIRAIYA-SENSEI for three years! And he was the master of relationships!"**

**Gaara decided to ignore the number of restraining orders and arrests that he knew the Sennin had to focus on a more important part of the discussion. "Jiraiya-sama wrote trashy novels. They don't seem real at all."**

**"See?! That's my point! You have no idea what a real relationship is like!"**

**"I doubt that **_**Icha Icha **_**is a good measuring point for that."**

**"The **_**details**_** may not be one hundred percent accurate, but the **_**general**_** ideas—"**

**"Naruto-kun! Gaara, Love!" Lee bounced over to them. "If we are to Complete this Noble and Vital Mission, we must be on our Way! The very Nobleness—Naruto-kun, were you bothering my Perfect Love again?" The green-clad man interrupted himself very sternly. "You know how much it Upsets your Youthful Love when you get Sand Burns!"**

**"Why is it always **_**my**_** fault when Gaara buries me in sand?"**

**"You know how Sensitive and Protective my One True Love is!" Lee scolded. "And it is very Un-Youthful of you to Bate him in Such a Way!" He reached down and yanked the blond loudmouth out of the sand.**

**"Ouch! Fuzzy-Brows—"**

**Lee gave him a blinding smile before quickly kissing Gaara. "Now, we must Focus on our Gallant Mission!"**

**As Lee bounded off, Gaara decided that Naruto didn't know what he was talking about. There was nothing wrong with his relationship with Lee; it probably wasn't normal as Gaara (and Lee, for that matter) was no good at doing things the way they were supposed to be done, but Lee was happy. Gaara was happier than he could ever remember being. And really, that was all that mattered.**

_**x Fin x**_


End file.
